Grudges Against Dad; Thanks For Nothing, Old Man!

If you’re like me, you have some serious grudges against your father.

Here are my three main grudges against the dude:

1) My Dad Never Hit Me

Thanks for not beating me, you jerk! Kids who get there ass beat at home tend to bully and kick other kids’ asses. My Dad never laid a finger on me. So when it was time for fight or flight, I was all flight all the time. Thanks for making me a huge pussy, Dad!

2) My Dad Was Not An Asshole Alcoholic

Alcoholics are generally shitty people. Quite often, children of alcoholics never touch the stuff because they don’t want to become like their shitty parent. You know what my Dad was like? Not a shitty alcoholic. So no need to avoid alcohol to not become like him. Thanks for nothing, you lame-ass square!

3) My Dad Always Told Me That I Could Be Whatever I Wanted To Be

And even worse, he allowed me to figure out what I wanted to be at my one pace. I still have no idea. I wanna be whatever the main character was in the last movie I saw. Hey Douche, How about getting drunk, putting your foot up my ass, and informing me that, “If anything, you’ll be lucky to be a plumber. Cause Lord knows, you ain’t better than me!”

If you’d done that, I’d have gone to technical school and would be gainfully employed now, instead of writing garbage that nobody reads. Dick!

In conclusion, I will never forgive you for any of this. Dad!!!